Thursday, June 23, 2011
It's time to be agressive
After reading a blog last night I've come to the realization that I'm way too passive. Yes, there is only so much that I can do for my husband. Yes, I understand that he is the one who needs to step it up and do what needs to be done. But I also realize that we are a team, and doing something alone is so very hard to do. Maybe if I become more agressive, he will become more agressive. Being diagnosed at 21 with juevenile diabetes must have been tough for him...his whole life was turned upside down. But it's been six and a half years, and the adjustment period should be finished. He shouldn't be happy with a bs in the 200's because "at least it's not in the 300's" and he should know by now how to keep his blood sugars level. But I suppose instead of being frustrated about how little he does, perhaps if I take a stand with getting this under control he will follow suit. Thankfully he doesn't suffer from neuropathy. And because his blood sugars always run so high, he is VERY aware when it drops. I'm talking, at 95 he starts sweating and is weak. He does, however, suffer from proliferative diabetic retinopathy. But, whenever there is an active bleed that he is able to see, we just make a phone call to the ophthalmologist and schedule some more laser treatments to cauterize those blood vessels. Unfortunately he lost his job just over a month ago-I'm a stay at home mom-so we don't have insurance. This is not good for a diabetic. But, I know that God will open a door soon. Just wish I knew what that door was...
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Don't mean to scare you, but your husband needs to work harder at keeping his blood sugars down. After approximately 30 years as a Type 1, my husband has experienced all of the following:
ReplyDelete- Retinopathy
- Beginning cataracts
- Congestive heart failure and an emergency triple bypass
- Kidney failure and a kidney transplant
- High blood pressure
- Arteriosclerosis (this probably caused the congestive hear failure) and peripheral artery disease
- Neuropathy
- Gastroparesis
- Spinal stenosis with lots of pain . . . his legs just give out on him at times, which is contributing to falls
- Short term memory loss
- Hypoglycemic unawareness
- Rage associated with blood glucose highs and lows
- Anxiety disorder, which also brings on rage attacks (lots of fun for me)- this may be at least partly related to all the meds he has to take so that he won't reject his transplanted kidney, which by the way, was once mine.
- Erectile disfunction (also lots of fun for me!)
- He is also sleeping a lot, at very weird hours
Please remind your hubby that high blood sugars cause organ damage, which is never a good thing! You mention diabetic retinopathy. If this continues at the rate it's going, he could eventually lose his sight if he doesn't keep his sugars down. My husband has his eyes routinely checked every 6 months.
Take care,
Lilly
You are right...these are things that I've though about but I just had the mentality that if he doesn't want to do it I can't make him. I know that there are some serious complications associated with diabetes and especially the high blood sugar levels that he maintains. I just hope that maybe I can push him harder and it will motivate him to do more. I can do what I can do to help, it's ultimately his decision. :( Sometimes I go to bed crying because I just don't know what to do. But thanks for the response...it makes me want to push that much harder to get this under control.
ReplyDeleteYou need to look out for you and your children. His illness makes a huge difference to what is a "normal family". If he can not work or does not work, you need to provide for your family. Being a stay at home mom is a luxury we wives have learned is a luxury we can not afford.
ReplyDeleteWith the potential for massive medical bills from a hospital or worse ICU stay without health insurance bankruptcy looms large. I know. I pay over $1000 a month for Blue Cross. He has tens of thousands of dollars of medical bills for each episode plus his medications are over a $1000 a month. Do you want to choose between a roof over your heads and food on your table or health care? I think not. We are no different from a widow who needs to support herself and her children, only he is alive and does not contribute financially but constantly drains us, physically, financially and emotionally.
I am sorry to be so harsh, but i wish I knew the score years ago.